Coping with OCD in a Relationship: Tips for Partners

Healthy relationships require effort, commitment, and communication. Whether you are in a new relationship or have been with your partner for years, it’s important to continually work on building a strong and fulfilling connection. In this article, we will discuss how to thrive within a relationship and offer tips for building a healthy and happy partnership.

What is OCD?

OCD is a chronic and debilitating condition that affects 1-2% of the population. It is a type of anxiety disorder that involves repetitive and intrusive thoughts, images, or impulses that cause intense anxiety, guilt, or disgust. People with OCD engage in compulsive behaviors or mental rituals aimed at reducing their anxiety or preventing harm, such as washing hands excessively, checking and rechecking things, counting, or repeating certain phrases. These behaviors or rituals can be time-consuming, interfere with daily activities, and may cause significant distress and impairment in various areas of life.

How OCD Affects Relationships

OCD can have a significant impact on relationships, especially romantic ones. The symptoms of OCD can cause distress and anxiety in the individual with OCD, as well as their partner. For example, someone with contamination OCD may be overly concerned with cleanliness and may insist on washing their hands or cleaning the house excessively, which can be frustrating and exhausting for their partner. Someone with OCD may also have difficulty making decisions, be overly concerned with symmetry or order, or have intrusive thoughts about harm coming to their loved ones, which can be distressing and challenging for their partner to understand and cope with.

Tips for Partners Dealing with OCD

If you are in a relationship with someone with OCD, there are things you can do to support them and manage the impact of their symptoms on your relationship. Here are some tips:

1. Educate yourself about OCD: Learn about the symptoms and treatment options for OCD. This can help you understand what your partner is going through and how to support them.
2. Encourage them to seek treatment: OCD is a treatable condition, and there are effective treatments available, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication. Encourage your partner to seek professional help and offer to support them in their treatment.
3. Be patient and understanding: Dealing with OCD can be challenging, both for the individual with OCD and their partner. Be patient and understanding, and try to avoid getting frustrated or angry with your partner.
4. Communicate openly and honestly: Communication is key in any relationship, but it’s especially important when dealing with OCD. Talk openly and honestly with your partner about how their symptoms are affecting you and your relationship, and work together to find solutions.
5. Set boundaries: While it’s important to be supportive, it’s also important to set boundaries and take care of yourself. Be clear about what you can and cannot tolerate, and don’t be afraid to say no when necessary.

Book on Coping with OCD in Relationships

If you or your partner is dealing with OCD in your relationship, there are resources available to help. Here is a book on the subject that may be helpful:

“Loving Someone with OCD: Help for You and Your Family” by Karen J. Landsman, Kathleen M. Rupertus, and Cherry Pedrick: This book offers practical advice and strategies for partners and family members of people with OCD.